Disclaimer

Note to PLC 06: In case you think I defamed you in any way, please re-read my entry (I’ve now deleted it because . I did say MSN nicknames might be a way to “act cool”, but I never said your nicknames never depicted reality. In fact I think your PLC’s cohesiveness is remarkable, maybe even unparalleled (and from what I have been saying to your . Perhaps you/ you all misread my entry. Even if I did (if and only if) depict yours as a way to “act cool”, I also never said acting cool is something that we should not do. What I did was identify it as a trend, and say that I value substance more than acting cool.

Sorry if I did “infuriate” any of you in the process. Overall, I wish you (PLC 06) the best of luck in 2006. Please tell me personally if I have angered any of you (after rereading these two entries). If not, this issue may never be solved.

Hey, this issue made me think of something (and I happen to be talking to Guan Hui about it now). Perhaps it might not be the right time to talk about it, but I will anyway.

During the holidays, my mum lent me a couple (in fact a few) books to read. Inside each of them were some stories (kind of picture book-ish stuff), but each story entailed a different set of philosophies (some were business, some were organisational so on). One of them particularly struck me. It was about this cavemen stuck in a cave, sucking rocks (and some other stuff for their survival) and not wanting to get out of the cave because they were afraid of the things outside. Well then, and I forgot how, one of the cavemen decided to venture out and saw this old man who told him lots of stuff (and I think I only remember half of it). Out of what he told him, I remember this story that the old man told him (maybe not told to full detail or accuracy): once there was this “village” around the area, and the village elder instructed half of the village to venture out in one direction and the other half to explore the other to find out what they would need to have.

Both groups came back. Group A (let’s just call it that) told the village elder that they needed to build shelter for themselves. Group B instead argued that they needed weapons for the village. Soon a fight ensued between both groups, and blah blah blah until we have our cavemen stuck in our caves (and I forgot why too) =x. The real reason why they had differing points of view was that what Group A saw on one side of the village was in fact a lush greenery full of ripe fruit; while Group B walking through the other side saw a jungle full of fearsome animals.

I’ll not talk about the business-philosophy part of this, but I think this story really tells us about why much conflict occurs today. The root concept is simple: Person A sees X, Person B sees Y, and since X and Y are different, and Person A and B are adamant on their views, conflict arises. Understanding this concept is vital to resolving future arguments with friends/adversaries in the future. I meet a lot of people while playing DoTA, and the only thing I can say: its better to get on the good side than the bad side of them. While they can be true friends, they are bitter enemies. Often this comes about from “misunderstandings”, that come from different sources: maybe differing interpretions or intentions. Generally, it will always be better make friends than enemies.

So how do we resolve such conflict peacefully? I know of people who argue and maybe splatter it all over their MSN nick, like “Stupid aaa don’t understand yyy”. In the end, they say “Let’s not argue further”. In my opinion, that’s a poor way to resolve conflict. That’s because its not resolving conflict at all! Eventually, when they start arguing again, they’ll raise the previous issues (like what they formerly described as “let’s not argue further”). Sounds familiar? (some Tummy Trim advertisement, or maybe for Brands/ Yomeishu) I’ve had it happen once or twice to me before, I suppose among the family (being the youngest it is rarely me who controls the flow of the argument, but I do have a large stake what the argument is about xD).

The right way should be to argue your way out with each other. I think it really helps Number one: reread and reexamine the arguments presented by yourself and your friend and see if your own are credible. In the working world, there are few irrational people (especially if everyone is working towards one objective for example profit) and I’m sure everyone will be willing to listen (unless they are forceful or unreasonable, that’s a different case altogether). In that case, if you do want to win your way through, argue with reason. Don’t launch personal attacks. Speak with a proper tone and if you have to, trash your own/trash your “opponent’s” points. I think this is still the best way to resolve this kind of conflict (i.e. the misunderstanding kind). I’ve done this a few times with friends, whether its the kind of DoTA arguments or the school arguments. Perhaps I’ve made known that its definitely not easy to convince me. (I have Belief as one of my characteristics in StrengthsQuest if I’m not wrong lol)

The last thing, which I admit I’m not good at (as you can see I’ve made people angry), is be sensitive while speaking. Very often speaking without thinking (or phrasing your words wrongly, like I MIGHT have done in the previous entry) can cause misunderstanding. Though I don’t think you can ask me about how to be sensitive, I know its a characteristic I don’t naturally possess sadly =x.

More comments please. Any personal attacks, please direct to me. Disclaimer: If you have a feeling you will vomit blood/ call my parents and tell them what a moron I am/ MAKE ME PHAIL GEOG AND MATH wait AND CHINESE/ ask my Physics teacher to take my precious A1 away, or simply put if you can’t take the points that I make, please refrain from reading this blog. This is just my perspective, and you have the right to disagree/ agree with it. Of course if you do talk to me about it I’ll tend to argue towards the agree side but that’s besides the point. Oh yeah if there is some problem in the organisation of this entry please accept it on the behalf that I wrote this after studying for Geog (and warm updrafts).

I need to try to be funny to maintain readership ++ j/k (not like fewer viewers would bother me anyway)

One for all. All for one. Venturez’ 06

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